All the characters, places and incidents in the following story are perfectly true. Resemblance to any creature, living or dead is not coincidential. No animals were harmed in the story. (ummm…Guess…Wait)
The following article is written in between the Scary END SEMESTER EXAMINATIONS. Why? Because exam time is the only time when your mind wanders in distant lands and you tend to answer very creative questions like ‘Why is melody so chocolaty’. So apologies if you find some terms in the article oddly related to computer science and engineering. My mind is a whirlpool.
The story dates back to our last semester examinations. The morning sessions in the ‘Lets get dead this sem’ start at 4 AM on the day of the exam. Obviously, if you haven’t touched the book the entire semester, this is a pre requisite.
So, my roommate Astha was studying, completely engrossed in electronics when she exclaimed she noticed a ‘Mouse’.
Impossible I thought. Obviously, the electronics wires had disrupted the wire system of the most sensible part of her brain.
We started studying again. When my other roommate, Palak, exclaimed ‘I saw it too’
Ah! These electronics people.
But then, all my thick air of confidence vanished when I saw it.
Umm. Spiders. Okay. Lizards. Okay. Moths. Okay . But not something which crawls on the floor and chews clothes and food. NNOOOOO!
After a tough struggle with the tiny brat for 2 whole days, in the middle of the examination, we managed to push it out of our room. Well, maybe it went away itself. I don’t remember.
Now what I am going to describe further is a detailed analysis and structural review of what happened this semester exam and how it interrupted our ‘God, please save this semester’ preparations.
So, I was studying the other morning completely engrossed in the page faults that occur when a page which isn’t present is accessed and how a mouse is attached on a computer system, when I noticed a ‘Mouse’.
I rubbed my eyes. What if all of this were a product of the computer System and hardware (mouse) that I was studying from 48 hours?
What if I am obssessed with mice? (Yeah, absurd thoughts are normal on the mornings when you’re about to give your paper)
I shouted ‘MOUUUUSEEE’
My roommates: Yeah girl, you are sleepy. There is no mouse. And even if there is, it won’t do anything. Let’s study.
Maybe there isn’t.
I called my mommy completely surprised that a mouse always appears in our room, just on the day of an End semester exam.
Now, Indian moms have a great logic of everything. She explained (jokingly) that maybe the mouse is a form of Lord Ganesha (who has a pet mouse) and he comes in your exams to bless you.
If a mouse means that God is trying to save my semester, I am okay with all sort of mice in my room.
We gave our exams and came back in the room. The day passed. No one saw it and a general theory was made that my hardware system was corrupted when I claimed that I saw it.
I am on a phone call, completely awake and I see it running in Palak’s room. I yelp in happiness ‘It’s true its true. I’m wide awake and I saw it hopping. It’s true’
Palak sees it. So now, yes, the mouse is in the room.
We switch our lights off and try to sleep completely oblivious to the fact that a creature is residing in our room.
I am in a daze, just about to sleep when Palak yells ‘THE MOUSE IS ON MY BED’
Crawling. Okay. Eating and chewing. Okay. Bed? Dafuq. NNOOOOO
We switch on the lights trying to think what to do. Astha is sleeping and we don’t want to disturb her.
By general consensus (of two people) we conclude that we need to push out the mouse right NOW, otherwise it is life threatening to sleep on our beds.
Palak is a creature who is afraid of all creatures except homo sapiens, so she has a wonderful idea, “Let us wear shoes and arm ourselves with brooms. It won’t attack us”
Yes. This is fuckin awesome. This weapon is more awesome than Jon Snow’s sword Longclaw, which can kill WhiteWalkers.
We gear up by tightening our shoe laces and arming ourselves with brooms.
The mouse reportedly is in my room, so the bed is moved, the cartons are checked to see if it is hiding in a corner. It is 1:15 and no sightings of the brat are reported. We start giving up.
Before completely giving up, I shift my table so that no nook and corner of the room is left unsearched. Boom, the mouse is on the curtain of the window, hanging on it (FYI: The curtain was 2 ft above the floor. God knows how a small brat like it climbed up)
I shriek in joy. More joy than I have after seeing a pizza. After all now it is a deed of the left hand to push it out.
Astha wakes up, highly disinterested. Her remarks ‘I have like 20 mice in my home. They do not kill you. You guys better sleep. ‘
We feel sorry for her and coax her to join the “MISSION: Mouse Bhagao. Neend Bachao” (Push the mouse out, pull the sleep in: bad translation, I know)
Now the plan is easy. The room is sealed by cartons all around so that the mouse cannot escape the area. The balcony door is opened. We just have to get it down from the curtain and it will run towards the balcony door and it’ll go and we can sleep.
I touch the curtain with the broom. The mouse hops from the curtain. Palak yells and hops on my bed (WITH THE SHOES ON). I run towards the mouse. Astha is still disinterested. The mouse hops OVER the cartons and runs to Palak’s room.
We provided you an easy exit. First you disrupt our syllabus, then our sleeping privacy and now you are not going through an easy exit. What the hell!
I am deeply distressed. It’s 1:30 AM. In our last attempt , we try to search the brat in Palak’s room. No. It isn’t there.
Palak is adamant to get it out, lest she won’t sleep. Astha is looking at us with an expression ‘Either you let me sleep or I will put you to sleep, forever’
I decide, as a last option, to search Astha’s room, as there is no other room where it could be.
We open the entry gate of our room.
The cartons beneath Astha’s bed ruffle. Our ears prick. Yes this is it, finally. I get out of the room for water when the mouse runs towards the exit. Yes, it is just near the door, just gonna get out, yes. I’m just outside the room and yell in anticipation ‘YOOHHOO. IT’S OUT’
But seems as if the mouse is a Salman Khan’s fan “Duniya mere peeche. Mai unke peeche. Too much fun”
It turns back, right at the door and enters the area under the bed. AGAIN.
I pray to the Lord Almighty now. “please god. Please. Till 1:45. Please get it out”
We know the mouse is hiding behind the carton. And suddenly, it hops inside the carton.
Alright. Now it’s tricky. It is jumping inside it.
Astha and me , with great difficulty push the carton with the broomsticks (it’s no less than Harry Potter’s in a situation like this) and get it out of the room.
To check if it is still in the carton, we open it with the broomsticks, ( aiming like an inexperienced person aims at rice with chopsticks). Yes. It is here. Inside the carton. Outside the room.
It is out people. We are escastic. We are planning to hold a Press Conference to get the world updated about how we did the Herculean task of life saving, but never mind.
Right in the middle of exams.
With brooms and shoes.
Chasing the mouse.
Dedication level: SUPREME.
Apologies for errors in the post. Written in a hurry.
I should better go studying. Otherwise I’m dead. And yeah! All the best to everyone dealing with exams and mouse. Both of them are “Life threatening”
PS: Just so you know, what a mouse looks like. 😛
Edit (After 2 days): Apparently Astha is not able to sleep from the night after the ‘Mouse incident’. There are peculiar sounds coming from her LAN port. Today, the people living in the adjacent room told us that a mouse had entered their room and entered the wall from the broken LAN port. And guess what, as it is trapped inside the two ports in the wall, it is creating havoc on our side by the ‘Kat Kat sounds’.
THE MOUSE IS BACK WITH VENGEANCE.